forever {or something like it}

I don’t believe in
not the version I was sold
perfect and pretty and
tied with a bow
placed (by request)
on a pedestal
to keep itself

My forever is fleeting and
flawed and humble in its
inherent lack of
it’s not easily subdued
nor naive enough
to imagine itself attached to a guarantee

this forever is
raw and rough and vulnerable
as comfortable with endings
as beginnings
and it cries as often as it laughs
because it knows that wisdom is found in
depths as well as heights
and that being utterly broken is necessary
to if one wishes to be built

it claims no rings, or vows or flowery promises
no ties that bind it to
some external validation
it sings it’s own song
and dances when it wants to
because it grew tired of seeking approval
or grasping at eternity

and so my forever let go
of itself
of everything
it was taught
because those truths no longer served
and it opened itself to interpretation
and it got comfortable with uncertainty
and it decided to just chill

so my forever is right now
as long (and as short) as
this moment
and this one
perfectly sweet
painfully broken
stretching out endlessly
yet ending with each exhale

it has no
dictionary definition
no civil responsibility
no nod of approval
and it revels in contradiction
and wants nothing to do with
blind faith
but you’d better believe
that acceptance (while not mandatory)
makes it all flow
so much easier

it just is
what it is
and damn if there’s not
a whole lot of power
in that.