{peace.love.free}

you can’t take your eyes off of me.

can you?

not now
not here

yes
there have been plenty of days
{there will always be plenty of days}
where I am the forgettable
wallflower
turning myself almost
inside out
to keep you from seeing

please don’t look

but when I move into this space

this one

right here
right here

with hips swaying
and head held high
mouth in sassy
smirk till lips part
almost ready to
speak

you lean forward

yes. you do.

you lean forward,
transfixed by the moment
before the moment
the potential tucked
inside my breath
just waiting for
my exhale to
lay claim to
something extraordinary

and
in that moment

i own you

yes I do.

it is not pretty face
or strong body or
divine catwalk style
{though those may be lovely to some}
it is not sway of hips
or curve of lips
or anything superficial
that captivate right now

because baby,
floating on the surface is
far too easy to
to rely on

and this isn’t about easy

nothing so peripheral could hold
such power.
not really.

it seems silly
to think there were days
when I believed
{and still, I sometimes believe}
that I could measure
the value of
my existence
in a reflective
piece of glass

look at me
look at me

my eyes would plead
am I good enough?
see me please
prove to me that I
exist
am not invisible
show me I do not blend
chameleon into
this beige life

and in my desperation
I became smaller
and you looked away

of course you looked away

but that was then

before the
knowing

knowing that
it is not profession
or skill
not intellect
or accolades
not even talent or passion or drive

no, it is nothing
that comes from
my looking
or my doing
I can’t write it with slick words
or capture it in bright pixels
I can’t paint a pretty face
or saunter in stilettos and
expect to hold
your attention

no, this is not about easy

but it sure isn’t hard.

the secret to this
particular
spellbinding
is my

being.

it is my being that
holds sway
keeps captive
your attention
and desire

you want

the very act of being
fully
to be content with
no elemental
half-life
but with expectation
of every breath flooding
every last atom
in this universe
into pulsing awareness

I am an
enchantress
when fully engaged
in being
vibrational frequency
shimmers liquid
across depth and breadth
and I am on fire
from the inside out

and then you are lit
from the outside, in.

and when I am no longer
content
with the effort of
not contracting
but instead choose to
expand

I expand

and I fill this space
refuse to be contained
by labels
or expectations
or boxes designed to keep me small

hell no.
not now.

now is my time
this is my space

and you can’t take your eyes of off me.

I’m not growing up here
I’m growing out
out
in all directions
possessing this space
every last inch,
every last fiber
every last sound

and all of you.

yes, this is poem is about
being
this life is about
being
and right now

i am all about being

but
this is not just about me
did you think that it was?

no, I own this particular swagger
only because I know that
this spark
is in every last one of us
and we can all strut
and smirk
and own the room
just by being

I know the fire that burns
in your gut
and I know your fears
of being seen
and of being invisible
and I know the tears that crack you
wide open
and the chasms that threaten
to swallow you whole
and I know your heart sometimes pounds so
hard that you’d swear
it could be heard around the world
if only people would wake up
and listen

and I know you are so ready
to expand
ready to
embrace
your particular
way of
being

So no, this could never be just about
me
because
quite frankly
you
are so damn amazing that

I can’t take my eyes
off of

you.

{this one is for my witches.  women of fire and ice.  of spells and incantations.  of fragile baddassery.  of power and beauty.  you know who you are.   this one is for all of you.  for at one point or another, I think you all will be the grace that saves me}

bow down and worship.

my soul
demands honoring.

bow down
and worship.

no, I’m not talking to you
or you
or anyone else

just me
only me
{always me}

she does not ask
for it outright
just whispers
her reminders
with slow, seductive insistence
when I let too long pass
without reverence

remember
she says
remember me

remember my divinity
my inherent dignity
remember my grace,
and my power
remember my boldly wanton
deliciously wicked core

know me
she reminds

know me

know this voice that chants incantations
with ancient witches
know this body that dances
naked around flames
know these eyes that glitter with hard truths
and this skin that quivers with soft touch

bow down
and worship.

my soul has birthed
a warrior that creates and consumes
an earthbound goddess that invokes Kali
and Durga
in one sweetly
divine
hotly inspired
breath.

my soul
she catches fire
and burns to light the universe
burns to light the way
burns to bring it all down

my soul
she is sex in the heat of afternoon
mothering in the deep of night
the ice of intellect
and the fire of passion
she is all I give to you
and everything I keep
for myself
{especially everything I keep for myself}

how often i
forget

how often we
all
forget

to pay silent
reverence
to practice
inward devotion
to remember

to remember

my soul
your soul
the collective consciousness of
all the worlds
soul

she allows herself to
come apart
that we may stay together
she is torn down
that we may
rebuild

she is exquisitely tender
and impossibly strong
and walks tall in light
and crawls low through the dark
she is a seductive dominatrix
and the gentlest lover
she is contradiction inherent
and she knows
the source of all things

she holds power
inside of fragility
and evolution
in her consistency
she can slice life with a sharp blade
and serpentine twist strands together

you must coo to her
like a child
and woo her
like a mistress
stroke her magnificent
ego
you must
you must

bow down
and worship.

and then
oh and only then
you can open your brilliant soul
to the world

because
{and I know this is true}
{you know that it’s true}
you’ve got to let yourself
feel
to write poetry
and you’ve got to bleed
in order to bring life
and you’ve got to open
if you want to expand

and you have to honor the divine
inside
to be worthy of worship

{and oh sweet, beautiful woman,
you are worthy of worship}

you have to lay claim
to it all
in order to move
the world.

and we all need to move this world.

so honor it all

let the devotion inspire
a life poem
let your body move
to dance her to sleep
let your voice sing
to coax her to awareness

get down on your knees

get down on your knees

let the reverence
flow up
and bubble over

because
our souls
demand honoring

yes you.
and you.
and everyone else.

bow down
and worship.